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9.23.2006

It is done.


Alrighty, I took a huge leap of faith on my part.

I posted up my pics.

Now, let me warn you... these are some of my worst pictures that I have of myself. They are the pictures you see of yourself and your mouth drops open with disgust - your hair raises on your arms... your fingers tremble because they yearn to rip them up into tiny pieces!

They are THAT bad.

But, I figured so-what if someone I know finds them. This is me, and right now I am fat. I can't change it over night - I see it as a trial in my life and I'm climbing the hill as we speak. Every dog has his day. I don't care if people call me a fatass or make rude comments about me - it may hurt for a split second - but I know the truth about myself. I have been blessed with a husband that loves me for me and has supported me through it all - friends that are curt, yet gentle. I know I am not perfect - inside and out. But, I also know I am not worthless. I do have a lot of weight to lose, I am moody as hell, sometimes I snap at people, and sometimes I can be judgmental - but I try to stay aware of my flaws in order to keep them in check. I guess what I am trying to say is, I am not perfect, far from it - but I have figured out how to love myself with all of my flaws... and I am pretty proud of the person I have came to be while treading through the muck.

Now, I am still using my alias - I just like it. But if you really want to know my name - it's Arica - but I prolly won't ever use it on here. I am going to post pics prolly every three months - and hopefully a difference will be seen!

I just wanna say thanks to all the other girls out there that have had the courage to share themselves online for the world to see - you guys have given me the courage to do it too! Oh, and that is my very first avatar ;)

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